Albert Haase has an excellent chapter on making decisions and discerning God' will in his book, Living the Lord's Prayer: The Way of the Disciple. Chapter 6, "Thy Will Be Done on Earth as It is in Heaven," details three steps in the process of discerning God's will:
1) Awareness. We need to distance ourselves from our own selfishness, be faithful to commitments we have already made, and be sensitive to "plain old good sense."
2) Assessment. We need to prayerfully reflect on the decision, seeing what the scripture says about it, discussing it "with people who know us well and who might be affected by our decision" and, as one person said, "Trust your gut-- but use your head."
3) Action. When the time is right, make a decision. Don't make a decision if you are tired, depressed, or feeling anxious. Haase says, "it is ill-advised to make a faith-based decision when a storm swirls around us... the best decisions are made when our feet a firmly planted on the ground."
Haase shares that when he was struggling with whether to end his career as a missionary to China, because the security police in Beijing had discovered who he was, yet he felt like a failure to quit. Finally, he sensed it was time to return to the United States, and the moment he gave himself permission to say that, he felt free.
Great advice for all of us as we try to discern God's will for our lives.